Category Archives: ARE YOU HAVING A LAUGH ?
“Seen this in The Sunday (lies) World and had to repost”.
The New Year is traditionally a time for optimism, sadly down the years ours has been wasted and without wishing to be a seasonal grump I’m not sure how long our optimism can take it. We’re getting used to being let down, but you have to hope don’t you? Things have to change eventually so why not in 2014. First thing that needs to change is the Chief Constable. Matt (maggot) Baggott has an unenviable task as head of the PSNI/RUC but he has shown he is simply not up to the job, whether its because of political pressure, his failure to handle the UVF has been spectacular. He was ill advised to have attended the PUP conference as the keynote speaker last year but he clearly can’t learn from his mistakes. With the UVF orchestrating night after night of street violence as the fleg protests swung into action the PSNI’s/RUC softly softly approach simply handed control of the streets to the terror group. His officers were expected to stand on the front line and take a battering – night after night – and when the PSNI/RUC did a deal allowing the UVF to police their own parades it was confirmation that the lunatics really had taken over the asylum. And if that wasn’t bad enough he insisted the UVF’s ceasefire remains intact, despite more than 30 murders since they claimed they put their guns beyond use and more recently the attemped murder of Jemma McGrath in East Belfast.
In the wider context we need the Orange Order to wise up. The outside world looks in and wonders what these strange wee men in bowler hats and collarettes are all about. Their intolerance and open hatred of all things Catholic is hard for anyone to grasp. And accommodating tolerant Orange Order would, in one fell swoop, disarm all those who want to see it condemned to the history books. The Order gives bigots an excuse, take it away and they fall. On the other side of the house the Shinners must be hoping that Gerry Adams‘ (pedo protector) closet isn’t any bigger. With the number of skeletons already out it resembles the Tardis! The Shame Fein president has been left damaged by his continued denial of IRA membership, allegations of involvement in the abduction and murder of Jean McConville refuse to go away and his handling of sex abuse claims levelled against his brother further wrecked his creditability. He is fast becoming a leader in name only – people simply don’t trust him anymore. Maybe 2014 will be a time the Shinners started looking for a new star. It’s not asking much but if we manage to secure these changes and the North of Ireland manage to win the match 2014 mightn’t be too bad.
With many thanks to: Richard Sullivan, The Sunday World.
- PSNI ‘have put life of youth worker at risk’ !!! (seachranaidhe1.wordpress.com)
- Northern Ireland intimidation drives hundreds from their homes (theguardian.com)
- Deputy Chief Constable (Gerry Kelly’s bitch) to retire three years after turning down Patten £500k (seachranaidhe1.wordpress.com)
- Board Cops Out Over Winkie Sacking !!! (seachranaidhe1.wordpress.com)
- Sunday World names Jean McConville killers (politics.ie)
- Loyalists blamed for boy’s shooting (belfasttelegraph.co.uk)
- Psni: Uvf Shot Care Worker Jemma Mcgrath (belfastdaily.co.uk)
The social and political chaos surrounding the Twelfth has become a comedy goldmine for internet satirists. Brendan Hughes looks at the lighthearted online reaction to the North’s volatile parading season.
THE news this week has been dominated by the Twelfth and its violent aftermath. But amid the alarming scenes of disorder on the streets and heated political debate at Stormont, many people have managed to see the funny side.
Events surrounding the Twelfth have provided an irresistible abundance of material crying out to be mocked and parodied. And most of this northern satire has devoloped online, through social networking websites. From flag protester Willie Frazer‘s latest arrest to the towering loyalist bonfires, Facebook and Twitter users have eagerly made light of the north’s annual parading season problems. One picture of a Twelfth rioter being flushed from atop a police Land Rover by water cannon has become a mini internet sensation, wwith numerous different parodies. ‘Loyalists Against Democracy’ (LAD), which was set up late last year during the Union Flag protests in Belfast, pictured above, is one of the north’s most popular satirical Facebook pages with more than 3,000 followers. Its team of voluntary contributors have entertained a poster for a fake electronic cigerette called the ‘e-fleg’, which enables loyalists to “display their Britishness” with “a harmless vapour”.
They also created pictures of Egyptian pyrmid-sizes bonfires and Willie Frazer superimposed into a poster from the TV show Breaking Bad. “People have accused us of inventing Willie Frazer because they think he’s an actor that we hire. He’s a great comic creation,” said a Belfast-based contributor to the Facebook page, who did not wish to be named. “The Twelfth has provided too much am
munition almost. There’s too much to keep up with.” Derry-based satirical Facebook page ‘Pure Derry’, which has more than 14,000 followers, created an image for the Twelfth showing William of Orange driviking a forklift in front of a bonefire. “The whole concept of shifting tyres and pallets I just find incredibly amusing,” the page’s creator and main contributor said. “The reaction has been great. It’s so specialised that it’s a very quirky sense of humour.” Comedian and prominent Twitter user Jake O’Kane gained hundreds of new Twitter followers during the Twelfth due to his tweets. “The problem with being a political satirist in the North of Ireland is that you just have to open the paper and repeat what is said. It’s farcical,” he said. O’Kane said social media has allowed many more people to get involved in political satire. “With social media now everybody can be a political satirist, or try to be,” he said. “It has been opened up a lot more so it seems that it has exploded but it has always been there in the background. “The nice thing about it is that there would be people who wouldn’t have the b***s to go up on stage but they now have a voice.” But the Belfast-based comedian warned that some social networking attempts at satire can become childish and abusive. “If you look at a lot of of social media unfortunately it’s the lowest common denominator. It’s like any new technology, it’s as much abused as used,” he said.
With many thanks to : Brendan Hughes. The Irish News.
- Get More Out of Your Plays (harthouselibrary.wordpress.com)
- William Frazer arrested, but why wasn’t it Gerry Kelly (newsletter.co.uk)
- Willie Frazer released again after bail breach (newsletter.co.uk)
- Revealed: the Moment Willie Frazer Was Arrested Over Stormont Protest (belfastdaily.co.uk)
- Loyalist campaigner Frazer arrested (bbc.co.uk)
- Ruling due on Orange Order march (belfasttelegraph.co.uk)
‘ What we are trying to eencourage is actually using plants such as climbing roses, barbarous plants that have a high thorn content, so you can protect your property - Kenny McHugh.
The PSNI explained to people in the Clooney Community Centre in Derry‘s Waterside the bbenefits of ‘defensive planting’ – flowers, shrubs and trees with sharp spines which would put off criminals. “What we are trying to encourage is actually using plants such as climbing roses, barbarous plants that have high thorn content, so you can protect your property,” Kenny McHugh from the crime prevention branch said. “When you look at the value of property that’s actually stored in your shed, on average your talking about £1,200 up to £1,500. “That’s very attractive to a burglar.” The event on Thursday was used to launch a public information leaflet on defensive planting which will be made available across the North of Ireland.
It includes a ‘spike rating’ of the best plants. “Criminals do not like climbingthrough prickly plants and hedges,” the leaflet says. “They know that a small item of ripped clothing or blood can help the police identify them.” Horticulturist Gareth Austin, who helped to develop the leaflet, said the response has been very positive. “A lot of what we’re covering is common-sense but it’s simple things that make the difference. “I’ve had tools go missing on me before and at £30 for a spade it all adds up. “All of my own tools are both visibly marked with UV ink.” The leaflet also encourages homeowners to keep boundary fences and hedges low to “allow as much natural surveillance as possible from neighbours and passing pedrestrians and traffic”. The PSNI urged anyone who suspects garden crime to call their neighbourhood crime prevention officer on 0845 600 800.
With many thanks to : CActual McGuigan, The Irish News.
- Burglars Keep Burgling Middle School Library (spdblotter.seattle.gov)
- Planting Tips…The Round, Spiky, Fluffy Rule (simplymadekitchenandcrafts.com)
- PSNI ‘sowing division’ over Troubles probe resources (morningstaronline.co.uk)
- Continued Abuse of Children and Illegal Stop Searches by the Psni/ruc (seachranaidhe1.wordpress.com)
- SF MLA was “forced to” cling to front of PSNI landrover (newsletter.co.uk)
- Burglar who took the biscuit and got caught red-handed at Piccadilly station (manchestereveningnews.co.uk)
‘A couple of politicians…. have already dropped me messages saying they think it’s class - Gareth Hutchinson.
SINN Fein MLA Gerry Kelly‘s run in with a police Land Rover has been recreated as a collectable miniature model. Model Shop Belfast made the inch-tall model after the North Belfast assembly member was filmed clinging to the front of a PSNI vehicle at Friday’s loyalist Tour of the North parade.
The store has since received dozens of orders after posting a picture of the ‘Gerry Kelly special edition’ model on Facebook. Manager Gareth Hutchinson said several politicians have contacted the shop to congratulate him on recreating the incident in miniaturised form. “It was literally put up on Facebook as a bit of a laugh and not expecting any response at all. But it has went through the roof. The response has been fantastic,” the 34-year-old said. Mr Hutchinson, from Belfast, spent most of Sunday creating the model after seeing news reports of the Tour of the North parade.
He painted a plastic Hornsby figure – the size of a five pence piece – to match North Belfast MLA Mr Kelly’s clothing. He then attached it to the front of a white-metal model of a Penman police vehicle, normally sold as a construction kit at around £20. Model Shop Belfast, based at Boucher Retail Park, sells a range of models of police vehicles used in the north. Mr Hutchinson posted a picture of the model with Mr Kelly on Facebook on Monday evening where it was veiwed by more than 40,000 internent useers. “It was a bit of a joke but last night there were lots of orders for the Land Rovers themselves and people were attaching emails asking for the figures,” he said. “A couple of politicians who will remain nameless have already dropped me messages saying they think it’s class.
- Minister hurt by police vehicle (standard.co.uk)
- Sinn Féin describe PSNI as ‘reckless’ after a minister was injured following Belfast parade (irishcentral.com)
- Minister Hurt As Police Land Rover Drags Kelly (seachranaidhe1.wordpress.com)
- Police pledge to investigate Gerry Kelly footage (newsletter.co.uk)
- Carál Ní Chuilín Injured by PSNI land rover after confrontation in North Belfast (politics.ie)
- Unionists call for probe into Gerry Kelly police footage (newsletter.co.uk)
- Video: Sinn Fein release footage of incident between Gerry Kelly and the PSNI landrover (newsletter.co.uk)
- Ombudsman called in after Sinn Féin minister hurt by police car in Belfast (realnewsnow.com)
SHAME FEIN leader Gerry Adams has revealed he was in North Louth when farmer Tom Oliver was abducted and murdered by the Provisional IRA. However, Mr Adams rejected as a “reprehensible accusation” a claim that he had been the sole member of the ‘Court of Appeal’ that decided Mr Oliver’s fate.
The 37-year-old victim, from Riverstown on the Cooley Peninsula, was found shot dead in Belleeks, Co Armagh, in July 1991. Before his murder, the father-of-seven had been tortured by the IRA who wrongly claimed he was a Garda informer. At one time, a relative of Mr Oliver told reporters it appeared that the killers had “thumped him senceless til he’d no idea where he was or what he was saying”. Speaking to RTE‘s Prime Time, Mr Adams admitted that he had been “In the Cooleys” when the farmer was taken and killed. He said he had been on holidays with his family and had had no involvment in the events that led to Mr Oliver’s death. Mr Adams said the killing was “to be condemned” but he criticised presenter Mariam O’Callaghan for suggesting he had played any role. The Louth TD also rejected claims by former Provisional IRA members Dolours Price and Brendan Hughes that he had a role in the 1972 murder of mother-of-10 Jean McConville. Mr Adams said his accusers, both now dead, were “telling lies” because they “thought I had sold out. They thought I was a traitor”.
With many thanks to : Valerie Robinson (Southern Correspondent), Irish News.
- Price tapes “could lead to the fall” of Gerry Adams (talkofthetown.ie)
- Gerry Adams says ‘brother confessed’ (bbc.co.uk)
- Gerry Adams denies trying to save his ‘political skin’ during brothers child abuse trial (irishcentral.com)
- My Brother Told Me He Molested His Daughter, Gerry Adams Tells Jury (belfastdaily.co.uk)
” If I had to I would ” - Iain Duncan Smith.
IAIN Duncan Smith yesterday dismissed claims that he was ” slashing ” welfare – and insisted that he could live on £53 a week. The UK’s work and pensions secretary said he was making the system fairer and giving people a chance to ” break free ” of benifits.
Ministers launched a fightback as 660,000 social housing tenents deemed to have a spare room begain to lose an average £14 a week in what critics have dubbed a ” bedroom tax “. It is part of a package of significant welfare and tax changes coming into force this month, which opponents say will hit poor familes and disabled people particularly hard. Changes to council tax benifits will see bills rise for an estimated 2.4 millon households in Britain rise an average £138 a year, with two million paying for the first time, an anti poverty group said. The system was yesterday hand-ed to town halls to operate but with 10 per cent less founding. On Saturday working-age benifits and tax-credits will be cut in real terms with the first of three years of maximum one per cent raises – well below the present rate of inflation. Two days later disabilty living allowence begains to be replaced by the personal independance payment which charites say will remove support from many people in real need. Later in the month trails begain in four London boroughs of a £500-a-week cap on any household’s benifits, and a new universal credit system. Piolt schemes for the flagship scheme have been scaled back amid reports -denied by welfare officials – that IT problems have derailed preparations for its rollout from October.
Labour claims the impact of the measures and other coalition polices have left the average family almost £900 a year worse off. Market trader David Bennett told BBC Radio 4′s Today programe yesterday morning that he earned around £2,700 last year from working between 50 and 70 hours a week. He said his housing benifit had been cut even though his children stayed with him several days a week and his overall income was about £53 a week. It was not clear why Mr Bennett was not receiving tax credits. Mr Duncan Smith, whose ministerial salary is equivalent to about £1,600 a week after tax, stressed that he did not know Mr Bennett’s individual circumstances. However, asked whether he could live on £53 a week, the former army officer, who married into a wealthy family, replied : ” If I had I would.” During the course of the day more than 21,000 people signed a petition on the change.org website calling for Mr Duncan Smith to “prove ” he could survive on £53 a week. The text urged him to ” live on his budget for at least one year “. He said the government was only trying to get welfare ” back in order “. ” We inherited a problem where we simply do not have the money to spend on all the things people would like us to do. ” What I am trying to do is get this so we don’t spend money on things that are unfair.” He urged critics to get the issue ” in perspective “.
With many thanks to : James Tapsfield, Irish News.
- I could live on £53 a week says Iain Duncan Smith (express.co.uk)
- Iain Duncan Smith: 200,000 sign petition urging smug minister to prove he can live on £7.50 a day (mirror.co.uk)
- Iain Duncan Smith: I have already lived on £53 a week and petition calling on me to do so again is a complete stunt (teessidesolidaritymovement.wordpress.com)
- Iain Duncan Smith: I could live on £53 a week (mirror.co.uk)
- Iain Duncan Smith petition: 100,000 urge smug minister to prove he can live on £7.50 a day (mirror.co.uk)
- Iain Duncan Smith: I could live on £53 per week (telegraph.co.uk)
- I could live on £53 a week benefits, claims Iain Duncan Smith (thetimes.co.uk)